Mistakes and Atonement
by Misaki Rika
Summary: Kenshin has done the unthinkable and guilt is consuming him. The best thing for him to do is leave and go wandering again...right? ONE-SHOT


A/N: Ok this is my first fic in a long time so please be gentle with me. It turned out way longer than I intended and I'm not 100% happy with it but if I waited until I was completely happy nothing would ever get posted. I may come back and edit more but who knows.

I approach Kaoru and Kenshin's characters keeping the affect their past must have on their mental state in mind. Kenshin clearly has PTSD which I think help explains his Battousai flashbacks and some of his thought patterns. I also think that Kaoru could have anxiety and abandonment issues since she was left alone for so long and betrayed by someone she trusted (issue one of the manga). I'm hoping to explore these ideas more in later fics.

Anyway, enough rambling! Enjoy!

 **Mistakes and Atonement**

The sound of metal on metal reverberated in the clearing as Kaoru watched the two men fight. The battle had the fluidity of a well-choreographed danced. The two swordsmen parried, struck, retreated, and advanced with the perfect timing of evening matched opponents. Kenshin's opponent was larger than him, dark where the rurouni was bright. The man's sword matched his size; a normal man would have needed to hands to accomplish what this man did with one. Speed was Kenshin's great advantage, strength meant nothing if the blows did not land. Kaoru could see however, that Kenshin's attacks were not hitting their marks either. This man was very skilled.

Kaoru knew that she should be more worried than she was. She felt the nerves like the very edge of her heart but they did not penetrate deeper, the idea that he could lose was not a real possibility to her. She had seen him fight so many times with so many different opponents and he had always won. It didn't matter how good they were or how high the odds were stacked against him, he had always been the victor.

"Kenshin…" she breathed out his name not consciously aware she had said it out loud. The fighting had paused and the two circled each other. Kenshin's foe was speaking and Kaoru could barely make out the words he was saying; the look of disgust on the man's face was apparent, even at the distance she stood. Kenshin stiffened at the man's words and Kaoru could see the slightest rounding in his shoulders; whatever the man was saying to him was affecting him. Small tendrils of unease dug into her chest and she moves closer.

"Do you honestly think there is any way to truly make amends for what you did? Do you think your foolish vow or pointless wondering will actually earn you any forgiveness?" The man chuckled coldly. "We are killers, Himura. That is all we will be remembered for, killing." He attacked Kenshin suddenly, managing to slice Kenshin's arm before the red-haired man could swat the sword away. "We are killers!" The man screamed as he attacked again, cutting Kenshin's side. "We killed together!" Slash across the chest. "Side by side!" Stab to the hip. "We bathed in blood!" Gash to the abdominal. "No one could defeat us!" Kenshin's sword was batted to the side as him enemy's weapon pierced his shoulder.

"Kenshin!" Kaoru screamed in horror as she watched Kenshin. She could see the agony on his face as he threw himself off the sword and crashed to the ground. Blood covered him, dripping onto the grass as he staggered to his feet.

"You are weak and pathetic." His cold eyes watched the wounded man stand and laughed. "Perhaps I should kill everyone in that sad, little dojo to prove it to you. First though," He mused almost to himself, "I want a little alone time with that girl you're so fond of…" A blow struck him and he flew backwards, managing to flip in the air he landed on his feet. He looked into the amber eyes of the Hitorkiri and the man smiled, "Better." The man stood upright and faced Kenshin. "The eyes of your former, true self are back." He lunged at Kenshin and the battle resumed.

Kaoru could see a difference now; the fighting was more raw and primal. The attacks came more quickly and with more savagery. It was happening so rapidly that Kaoru would lose track of their movements for short periods of time. Blows were landed on each side causing bruising to appear on the man and blood to continue to soak Kenshin's clothing.

The black haired girl watched, deep blue eyes wide with true alarm now. 'He's reverting! Kenshin is reverting to the Battousai!' The fear dug claws into her chest making her breathing fast and shallow. She didn't know what to do! She didn't know how to stop them!

"Very touchy about your whore, Battousai." The man's taunting voice was filled with mirth. "It's greedy of you to keep such fun looking plaything to yourself." The desire to commit violence wafted off the smaller man. The man laughed at Kenshin's rage. "She must be good if you're so possessive! I can't wait to taste her!"

Kenshin screamed in fury at the man's words, his sword thrusts coming more viciously. "I will kill you." His normally gentle voice was icy. "Scum like you will not be allowed to live!" With blinding speed the sword sliced across the man's chest, the force flung him back several feet. As she continued to close the distance Kaoru could see the nasty indent in the man's flesh. "Not so talkative now, are you?" Kenshin approached the prone man. "You won't speak those words again." The man screamed in agony as Kenshin's sword swiftly came down, crushing one hand and then the other. Kaoru began to sprint towards them.

Kenshin's cold, amber eyes gazed down at the man as he raised his sword to deliver the killing blow, "I will end you."

"Kenshin! NO!" Kaoru lunged, grabbing at Kenshin's sword arm, desperate to stop him. He evaded her outstretched hands, his arm dipping below hers and striking her in the chest with his forearm. She was sent flying backwards and hit the ground hard, her head cracking against the rough ground.

The instant it connected, Kenshin's now amethyst eyes widened in horror. "Miss Kaoru!" Kenshin sprinted to where she fell. "Miss Kaoru, I'm sorry, that I am! You must be alright, that you must! Please be alright!" He heard Kaoru let out a little cough and felt her try to sit up. He placed a hand at the small of her back to help ease her effort.

Inhaling was painful and so breathing was difficult but she paid it no heed; it as not her main concern. "Kenshin are… Are you alright?"

"Miss Kaoru, you should not be worrying about me, that you should not! Miss Kaoru… I… I…" Kenshin's voice caught in his throat. How could he? How could he? Guilt was crushing him; all he could do was stare at her in horror, especially at the shadow of a bruise that was beginning to show itself above the open, disheveled neckline of her kimono. How could he have done such a thing?

"Kenshin, really, I'm ok." The pain was evident in her voice, no matter how hard she tried to mask it. "I'm just happy you're back, Kenshin." She caressed his left cheek, "I was so worried about you…"

He jerked away from her soft touch, such kindness was not for the likes of him. "But Miss Kaoru I have done the unthinkable, that I have! I have hurt you! I've…" He couldn't go on. His head hung in shame, throat closing with emotion, tears pricking at his eyes.

"Look at me. Look at me, Kenshin!" The firmness in her voice drew his gaze upward. "That wasn't you, Kenshin. You are not that person anymore. The Battousai is an enemy that lives within you and you grow stronger than that enemy every day. You have changed so much since you first wandered into Tokyo. We all slip up when battling the darkness in us and it's ok, Kenshin. I'm here for you…"

He flinched at her words. She didn't understand. She didn't know. His past tainted him. He was a murderer. He was a killer. His promise of the last ten years didn't change that. And now, now he had hurt Miss Kaoru. It didn't matter to him that he was not himself, not present in this time. It didn't matter to him that in those moments while he was Battousai it transported him back to the days of the revolution, where everyone was a potential enemy. He didn't care that when she had tried to grab his sword arm, to Battousai, it turned her into another enemy trying to kill him. None of that matter, none of it was a valid excuse for his actions. He should have been better. He should be able to control himself better. But he lost control and he hurt Miss Kaoru and what if...what if he had...

"Kenshin...?"

"We should get you back to the dojo, that we should. The police can take care of him." He jerked his head towards the now unconscious man. He then scooped her up and began walking towards the dojo.

"But Kenshin!" Kaoru protested. "You're injured! You need to be tended to! I'm alright, really. Put me down."

Kenshin's grip around her tightened as she tried to put her feet down on the ground. "No Miss Kaoru. My injuries look much worse than they actually are; they were shallow and have stopped bleeding, that they have. Your head is bleeding and you are the one that needs to be tended to, that you are."

"But…" She began but the grim line of his lips and determined gaze welcomed no argument. Her response died in her throat out of fear that he was angry with her. Was he angry that she had interfered? That she had stupidly gotten herself hurt? She shouldn't have tried to grab his sword, of course that would have triggered the manslayer within him would retaliate. She should have known better. She had let her emotions get the better of her and didn't think as usual… They were silent during the walk home; Kenshin too filled with guilt to form words, Kaoru not knowing what to say to him. When they arrived, Kenshin pushed the gate over with his foot, unwilling to use his hand because it would jossle Kaoru.

The dojo was silent and empty as they walked in. Yahiko was spending the day helping at the Akabeko and Sano was probably out gambling, it was too early for him to be over to beg for dinner. Megumi and the doctor were out of town attending a gathering of medical professionals and the girls were with Miss Tae. Kaoru wasn't sure if it made it better or worse that her and Kenshin were alone.

He set her down on the deck gently and quickly walked away, mumbling something about getting medical supplies and making her tea. Kaoru could feel her anxiety and depression start to eat at her. Would Kenshin leave her and go wandering again? He didn't speak to her the whole walk home and he wouldn't look at her. If he left, she would be alone again. True panic filled her lungs, constricting them. No. She couldn't be alone again. She couldn't go back to dark isolation, with no one understanding her, with everyone looking down at the woman who practices kenjutsu. Kenshin… Kenshin was the first person to see her, he broke through the loneliness, he was her friend, he understood her. Her hand clutched at her neck, her whole body becoming cold. He couldn't leave!

"Miss Kaoru are you alright?" Hurried steps followed by the clatter of a tray penetrated her panic and she looked up. "Is your neck also hurt? Are you in pain?" His sweet voice was filled with concern and dismay.

"No, no I'm alright. My neck doesn't hurt. I'm not hurt…" Burning pain seared through her as she tried to get up, her head felt like it was spinning. She gasped, hands going to her chest as she sat down heavily. Strong hands caught her and she looked up into concerned, violet eyes.

"You are hurt, that you are!" He bit his lip. He was very worried, he had no way to know how seriously he had injured her her chest. Miss Megumi wasn't in Tokyo and he didn't know anyone else that could help, that knew how to treat this kind of impact wound, except…

"Miss Kaoru, you are hurt, that you are, and it needs to be looked after. There is not anyone that can treat you except me, that there is not. I'm sorry Miss Kaoru, but you could have broken ribs and it needs to be looked at, that it does." He couldn't look at her, the shame and embarrassment was too much. It wasn't enough that he had caused the injury, now he had to dishonor her as well. 'There is no redemption from this.' He thought. 'Killing enemies in battle is one thing, but this? Unforgivable.' Sorrow threatened to swallow him as he waited for a reply from the girl in his arms.

Kaoru's cheeks were turning red at the thought of Kenshin looking at her bare chest, tending to it. A thrill of pleasure ran up her spine at the thought of him touching her but she shoved it down. It was not the time for those thoughts. "Umm...alright Kenshin. I'll let you look at it. I really don't think it's anything serious though, just a bruise. You're worrying too much." She smiled at him trying to reassure him, trying to wipe the guilty look off his face. "After though, you have to let me look at your wounds. Deal?"

The red-head bobbed slightly in response and picked her up again to take her to her room. He set her down briefly to set up her futon and then relocated her, hoping it would be more comfortable for her. He left her alone there momentarily as we went back outside to collect what he couldn't carry while she was in his arms. Once he returned, he knelt beside her and laid all the ointments, bandages, and the bowl of water he had gathered, along with the pot of tea he had made. He started, wordlessly, with the head wound. Kenshin gently took her hair out of it's ribbon and with a damp cloth slowly and carefully worked to clean away the dried blood and dirt. Once the debris was out of his way he could see that there was only a small cut on her head, accompanied by a decent sized lump. She may have headaches for a few days, but it was nothing serious. Kenshin internally sighed with relief as be applied a salve to help it heal faster; his mind then turned to his next task and unease, along with another unnamable emotion, filled him.

"I'm sorry, Miss Kaoru, but," He paused. "But I need to remove your kimono, that I do. Just the top half." He added quickly, wanting to make the situation as easy as possible for her. At her nod, he began to gingerly untie the knots that held her clothing in place. He helped her take her arms out of the sleeves, careful not to let the lower half of her kimono open. Next, he turned his attention to the breast bindings she was wearing and he started to unwind them. As more and more of the purple mark was revealed to him, his level of depression rose. It was a dark, deep color that went across her chest and he could see the it was swollen slightly. "It would be easier to tend if you laid down, that it would." He said quietly. She nodded again and he helped her to slowly recline. His slim, strong fingers began to prod their way along her sides and the center of her chest, checking for any broken bones.

There thankfully weren't any and he said as much to Kaoru. She smiled up at him, cheeks slightly red from embarrassment at being so exposed in front of Kenshin. He did not return her smile, instead he picked up another salve and began to very gently rub it into the bruising. He felt her flinch under his fingers and then relax again as the herbs in the ointment took effect. He worked slowly, wanting to be sure he touch the bruise and nothing else, but…

He couldn't help but notice how lovely her skin was, how soft it felt under his fingers. Her neck was so graceful, her collarbone created an elegant line, her breasts… No! He must not dishonor Miss Kaoru any further by letting himself think of her that way. Today had proven to him what he'd always known: He was completely and utterly unworthy of someone as beautiful and kind as Kaoru. His presence here put her in danger not only from those who wanted to challenge him but today had shown that what he had feared most was true; he was dangerous.

'I should leave.' He thought, but the idea of leaving this place made him ache. This was the first place where he ever felt at ease, felt at home. As a child, he lived in a shack with holes in the walls and roof; it was freezing in the winters and blistering in the summers. His parents did their best before they died, but food was always scarce and the fear of bandit attacks made the environment tense, not at all home-like. He was then moving from place with the slavers, then he lived with Master Hiko. Though he knew his master cared about him, the cabin never felt like it ever became his, it never became his home. After he left Master Hiko, he was constantly moving as a manslayer in the revolution, setting down roots was death in those times. The house he had inhabited with Tomoe was probably the closest he had come until now, but he was so uneasy there; he could never relax enough to let the place become home. For the last ten years he was a wanderer, purposefully not staying anywhere too long, not wanting to get attached to anyone. But then…

Then as he was leaving Tokyo, he was confronted by a girl with a fiery spirit and a wooden sword in her hand and she had welcomed him into her home, had accepted him and helped him build the funny little family they have now. She had helped him to ease the guilt of his past actions, helped him to feel peaceful, helped him to feel like maybe he could be a normal man, maybe he was worth something beyond his ability with a sword. 'And you were a fool to think any of that!' He scolded himself. 'After all these years, you'd think I would know better. I bring pain wherever I go; this is why I should not stay in one place too long.'

"Kenshin?" He hadn't realized that his hands had stopped moving. He quickly resumed, hoping she would remain silent. "Kenshin? Kenshin, please. Talk to me." Her voice trembled slightly.

"I'm sorry, Miss Kaoru. I lost control and you were hurt, that you were. There is nothing I can do to repent for this. This is unforgivable, that it is." He shut his eyes to try and keep the tears at bay, his own emotions choking him.

"Kenshin, you idiot." Kaoru tried to sit up, the man beside her protested and attempted to get her to lay down again. "No Kenshin! You will listen to me!" She grabbed his face with her hands and forced him to look at her, forgetting that her chest was completely bare. "Your demons are not you, you were not yourself, you were not here. I know about your past, I know more than you think. My father fought in the revolution, the revolution took my mother from me."

Kenshin placed his hands over hers. "Kaoru…"

"My father killed people. He killed and he killed during the revolution and when my father came home, he was not the same. I have very few memories of my father from before the revolution was over but I know when he came home, there was a dark cloud within him that was not there before. It haunted him for the rest of his life, but those same demons are what inspired him to create the Kamiya Kasshin sword style. He wanted something good to come from the demons he struggled with. He tried so hard but sometimes the demons won and I would see the man my father was on the battlefield. He hid it from me as best he could but I saw and I knew. I knew the price of the peace that I have gotten to live in for the majority of my life. Your sins, the sins of my father are what created this time we now live in. Killing is wrong and should not be justified but that doesn't change the fact that your actions paved the way for peace." Her voice cracked but she continued.

"You are repenting, you are creating good out of the evil just like my father did. I see the pain you still bare and I know the past overcomes you as it did him, but that does not change the fact that you are a kind, generous, and good man! And after all the times you have been hurt protecting me, I… I…" Tears were pouring out of her eyes and she sobbed, "I'm happy I could do the same! I'm happy I could protect you, to help you! All I've ever wanted to do was be there for you! I care for you so much, Kenshin!"

"K-Kaoru…" Tears rolled down his face and their clasped hands. Could what she said possibly be true? Could she really feel this way? Could she really believe that he was worthy of being cared for? Could she possibly have the same feelings for him that he had for her, feelings that he had pushed down and pushed away? He gazed into her watery eyes that were filled with sincerity, determination, and something else. No one had ever looked at him that way before. Her eyes were so tender, so loving… He was drowning in the depths of them, his chest constricting with all the feelings her words had created. "Kaoru…" He said again, struggling to put the swirl of emotions into words. He wanted to believe her, he didn't want to believe her. Her words made sense, but they couldn't be true. She cared about him, but he was dangerous, he wasn't good for her. But she said... He was overcome, he could not think. He loved her. He loved her so much. "Kaoru…" He leaned forward, capturing her lips in his. He felt her tense in surprise then immediately push back, kissing him in return.

A desperate, frantic emotion filled both of them and neither knew what it was, neither had ever experienced anything like it before. Kenshin pulled her closer to him until she was sitting in his lap, simultaneously deepening the kiss. She responded by wrapping her arms around him, helping him to move her body closer, enjoying the feeling of being so near to him. He felt her bare breast touch his chest through the opening of his gi as she pressed herself to him. It sent a spasm of desire shooting through him. The shock wave caused him to pull away in surprise, violet eyes wide. "Ummm... Miss Kaoru your kimono…" He said quietly , already regretting the need to draw her attention to her state of undress.

Her eyes widened and face turned a deep red, confirming his suspicion that she had forgotten that her kimono was not in it's proper place. She quickly reached for the top of her clothing that trailed behind her and slipped one of her her arms through the sleeves, the movement causing her to slip off Kenshin's lap. Her breathing was erratic, partly from embarrassment but mostly from the kiss. She was having a hard time keeping thoughts in her head, thing were coming at a rush and she had no clue what to say to the beautiful man in front of her.

Kenshin was having similar problems. He had kissed her without thinking; it had been something he had wanted to do for some time now but had never let himself. Now that he had he needed more. The feel of her in his arms, her lips on his, their bare skin touching set a fire inside him blazing. He didn't know it was possible to feel this way, he had never craved something like this before. His eyes were still wide, staring at her, knowing that he must be making her uncomfortable wasn't enough to make his tear them away. 'Say something, damnit! You have to say something to her!' But no words came to him. 'You're an idiot! Say anything!' He forced himself to stammer her name, trailing off, still unsure of himself, mind still blank. "K-Kaoru…" He tried again.

"You're bleeding, Kenshin." She pointed at his shoulder, where the stab wound had reopened. As she slipped her other arm into her sleeve he could see that there was some blood on her it where it had touched the wound while they kissed. "It's your turn to be treated, we made a deal." She continued, grateful that she had something to say, to do while she collected her thoughts.

"Yes, Miss Kaoru, that we did." He inwardly sighed in relief at the end of the silence and that she had provided him with a chance to gather his own thoughts as she worked. His hands lifted themselves from his lap and began to take off his gi and was surprised when her slim hands assisted him but said nothing. She grabbed one of the clean cloths, dipped it into the bowl of water, and began to clean all of the dried blood off his skin as he watched her. It would sting slightly as she passed over some of the cuts but he didn't let it show, not wanting to worry her. He could tell that the injuries really weren't much and would heal well without interference, however as a man of his word he let Kaoru continue, trying not to enjoy it too much. That was extremely hard though. He had gotten a taste of her and he wanted more, needed more. The brush of her fingers across his bare skin was sending little shivers down his spin and it took all of the control he had honed over his life to keep himself still. 'This is not what your mind should be on, idiot. You still need to talk to her. You know you are completely beneath her. Her pretty words don't change that. You know that leaving is the best thing; you are dangerous. You lost control when you hit her, you lost control when you kissed her, next time you lose control...' His mind whirled as she continued her work; stuck on these self-deprecating, negative thoughts.

After cleaning off all the blood, Kaoru rubbed a salve on the wound that was still bleeding slighting and then bandaged it. She kept her mind on the work, trying not think of anything else and failing. 'Kenshin kissed me!' It was something she had been wanting for so long and it was beyond anything she had imagined. It was like lightning coursing through her and she was desperate for more. She was taking longer than necessary to clean and dress Kenshin's wounds but she couldn't help herself; she was getting too much enjoyment out of the sight and feel of him without his gi on. 'Idiot! You should be trying to figure out what to say to him instead of being a pervert.' A small sigh escaped her lips, causing violet eyes to turn and meet hers. "Umm….Kenshin…" She began, only to be interrupted.

"I'm sorry, Miss Kaoru." Kenshin's thoughts had plunged him back into despair. It would hurt, it would hurt more than he could imagine, but he had to leave. He knew he did; it was better for everyone this way. "I am a danger to you here, Miss Kaoru, that I am. There will always be those who wish to challenge me who will put you in the middle of the battle, but also…" He paused, hands balling into fists. "I am dangerous. I have proven that I can't keep control of myself, that I have. I will lose control and I will hurt someone again. I have proven myself unworthy of the kindness you have shown me; I have taken advantage of you, that I have. I should not have done that for so long, and before when I…" He couldn't get the word 'kiss' past his lips. "It has been selfish for me to stay here so long. I will leave so that you can be in peace, that I will."

Her hand smack across his face so quickly that he didn't have time to react. His left cheek was hot and stung from the wipe-like strike. His own hand came up to touch the now very red cheek and he stared at her in pure shock. There were no tears in her eyes, her rage was fiery and dry, her blue eyes glaring at him viciously.

"Kenshin, you, you _ass!_ " Her breath was coming in huffs. "How dare you! How dare you be so selfish and cowardly! How dare you abandon the people who have stood by you through everything! How dare you abandon those who care about you! You made a mistake and so what, you're going to run away? How dare you throw what I have, what we all have done for you back in our faces! You are a _coward_ Himura Kenshin!"

"Miss Kaoru, I…"

"No! Don't you dare 'Miss Kaoru' me! You are selfish, Kenshin, but not for the reasons you think! You insult all of those who care about you by thinking you are unworthy! Do you seriously think any of us would waste our time if a _quarter_ of that nonsense you think about yourself was true?! Do you even care about the pain you leaving will cause us all?!"Silence stretched between them. " _Well?!"_ She demanded when he didn't respond.

"Oh! Uhhh…" He struggled with his words again. She called him a coward, she called him selfish. Was that true? Leaving was the best thing right? He needed to keep everyone safe, even if that included staying away from them. That's why he moved around so much, danger followed him, violence was within him, he shouldn't be around people. 'My leaving would cause pain…?' Had him leaving caused pain before? He didn't know, he never said goodbye to anyone, except to Kaoru and he knew that it had been painful but he assumed she would get over it. Forget him. 'But she didn't, she followed you and brought you back. She pulled you out of your past and back to your present.' That was it! He had been living, wallowing really, in his past for the last 10 years, never growing beyond it.

"Well, Kenshin?" Her voice was harsh with anger and hurt.

"You are correct, that you are…" He said very quietly. His solution for far too long had been to keep the world at arms length to protect himself, not others. He hadn't killed himself, which would arguably be the most apt punishment. No, he wanted to live and continue to do good in the world, but… But didn't that mean he could have a _life_? His own life? His master had helped him regain the desire to live and now Kenshin knew in his bones that it meant more than just existing. 'My mistakes don't mark me forever, how I respond to them is what matters and I have done all I can to atone for the many mistakes I've made and I will continue to try and bring joy to others. I am also allowed to feel joy myself, I am allowed to want things for myself.' The thought scared him, it was frightening to be his own person. It was overwhelming to realize how cowardly he had been, running away from his problems. It was difficult to come to terms with the fact that taking everything upon himself was selfish, it showed those he cared about, who cared about him that he didn't put trust in them.

He looked up at the beauty still glaring at him, her blue eyes flashing like lightning. 'I'm allowed to want her…' His own thought surprised him and he could feel self-doubt and self-loathing creep into his mind, but underneath that, in his core, he knew it was true. He reached out to her and tucked some of her silking hair behind her ear. 'I'm allowed to be loved…' Her eyes were softening at his gentle touch which encouraged to cup her cheek, feeling the softness of her skin. 'I'm allowed to love her…' And god did he love her! Everything about her, even her temper and aim when she hurled objects at him. 'I love you. I love you…' His mind chanted over and over again, his eyes taking in every detail of her face.

"I love you…" Her eyes widened and her lips parted in silent surprise. He hadn't meant to say those words aloud but they felt so natural. Kenshin held his breath as he took in her shock, uncertain of what her response would be. Slightly afraid.

"K-Kenshin... Do, do really mean that?" Her words were barely audible.

"Yes, oh god, yes Kaoru," The words tumbled out before he could stop them. "I've loved you for so long, that I have. I felt so unworthy of you, I was afraid I would taint you, I didn't want to burden you, but I couldn't stop myself from loving you, I could not. You are so strong and independent and kind and generous and, god, you are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, that you are. You fill me with lightness and joy. I love you so much, Kaoru…"

Her hands reached for him as she leaned forward, arms wrapping themselves behind his neck, pulling him into her. Kenshin kissed her back eagerly, losing himself in her touch. He could feel her strong hands tangling themselves in the hair at the nape of his neck as he slipped a hand of his own into her silky tresses, his other wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer.

"Kenshin…" She breathed into his lips. "I love you too, Kenshin…" She could feel a wide, joyful smile spread across his face before he pulled her in again. Giddy, happiness filled them both and they shared it in their kiss. Neither had been truly loved for themselves, never felt truly accepted by another person, until they met each other. Fear, shyness, and insecurity had kept them from completely opening up to one another, but now all walls were down and both were overflowing with more happiness than they could stand.

They pulled their faces back, bodies still entangled and gazed at each other. Kenshin didn't know how long they stayed like that, in that blissful state before his usual, needling doubt crept back into his mind. "Kaoru…" He said quietly. "I don't have anything to offer you, except myself. I still have demons I struggle with and I probably will for the rest of my life…" A slender finger silenced him.

Kaoru shook her head at him and smiled softly. "You have already given me more than you know. We both have demons and we will battle them together."

"Together…" Kenshin repeated. "Yes, together…" He returned her smile and hugged her close. That's how Yahiko found them, sleeping curled in each other's' arms, small, peaceful smiles on both their faces.

"About time." He mumbled, his own grin spreading from ear to ear.

And there it is! Thanks so much for reading! Please review and let me know what you think!


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